Sunday post...

Below is what I wrote in my hotel room before I slept:

Wanted to sleep late today but end up waking early as usual..hmm…went out 11ish to find a café to chat with Dango..It was a nice café…with gays n I saw the 1st butch here.
I thought about many things…but when it comes to writing down, everything is such a blur…. One of the things I thought about is whether I would I do on weekends after I found a apt. I used to think I will be fine with watching tv and maybe cook abit and do housework but now it seem it will be depressing. Its not the standard of living cause with money, everything can be the same . But yet….

I was telling the msia gal colleague when we meet to have dinner that Im getting irriated walk on the streets cause I do not like being harassed. I feel like I’m being watched all the time when im on the street. I don’t like that. I also nearly got knocked down by a bike today. I am starting to want to hibernate myself. And it dreads me that tomorrow I gotta work. Maybe it’s because I’m not too sure what Im working on now..or rather how to start it. But with familiar stuff, I think I will be feeling better. I feel fake. I feel I have to fake to socialize when I do not like to. But I guess soon my real self will show itself….but yet I don’t like that because I’m very anti social. But with all the pro and cons of socializing, I guess I rather put up with the inconveniece of being lonely.

I suddenly miss dango a lot after my trip to the café. I just feel that I have to connect with her again. To be connected so as to be able to express my thoughts whenever I want and to hear her talk about anything. I hope next week fly past…and I can find my apt soon. Time used to be fast at cityindex…maybe cause Im doing my things. I want to start my things asap too…to escape from all these unfamiliar stuff…